Why do I let this happen? Go a whole two weeks without a proper blog post? I think we all enjoyed the “pressing the mind grapes” posts but come on. Let’s get back to it.
Friday, August 6
After work, I headed up to the groundbreaking for the Old Town School’s new building. The lot was full of people who mingled, ate pizza, and enjoyed the music being played by some teachers and students. There was a pile of dirt into which a sign had been stuck: “Please don’t climb Folk Mountain.” Small children ran around the tent and splashed in a shallow, muddy puddle just behind.
I missed being at BlogHer with Rachel and Julia and Poppy. I heard Flat Jasmine had a good time. I’m seriously considering going next year when BlogHer is in San Diego.
I wonder if I could find someone to pay me to just attend conferences for a year? BlogHer, South By Southwest, Blogworld, Comic-Con. I want to finish 2011 with enough swag to choke a horse, and enough badges to make a dress. I promise, too, to document it thoroughly on a charming Tumblr blog that will get me a book deal in the low six figures (okay, upper five!) and some appearances on VH1 or Bravo when they want “personalities” for a television special on the 1990’s.
Saturday, August 7
I saw Har Mar Superstar play kickball in his underwear.
Do312 organized a celebrity kickball tournament where celebrities (who were all in town for Lollapalooza) played kickball. Not for charity, as no tickets were sold. For fun, I guess, and exposure for Do312, which is new.
I brought my friend Lisa, who knew one of the celebrities involved – her friend Jim, who turned up right after teams where chosen. I don’t remember if he was on the same team as Alia Shawkat (Maeby on Arrested Development) or Aaron Paul (he’s on Breaking Bad, a show I don’t watch but I’ve heard is very good) but I do recall that he was one of many dudes on the field drinking beers.
I’m not sure who won but I got more tan and I got to scam food that the caterer had previously told Lisa “was for the players”. But there were more players than spectators, for sure. Sister, can you spare a coconut water?
After the game, Lisa and I headed to Chinatown, ate at Joy Yee’s (next to an annoying boy and his family) and bought candy at Ichiban where I spent about $20 on Pocky.
Sunday, August 8
I bought sneakers (that I ended up returning). I saw Dinner For Schmucks where I sat next to an annoying teenage girl who kept checking her phone for text messages. The girl became downright disgusting when she started gnawing on her nails and I could hear ever single bite.
I think this is the part where you stop envying my swinging single gal life.
Tuesday, August 10
I have some time before I have to meet Nite for a screening of Going The Distance (which cute and raunchy so you should go see it), so I stop at XOCO to get a torta and the daily agua that I eat while waiting in line at the theater. I’d brought a bag of churros to give to anyone who wanted but nobody wanted one. Some PR girls were giving our promotional t-shirts but they had no shirts in a ladies’ 2X (such is the way of American Apparel, I’m afraid) and I settled for a water bottle.
I like the movie because it seemed fresh and funny and Drew Barrymore’s hair looked awesome. Also, it made a fairly strong case (or a funny case, anyway) for dry humping, mustaches, and Charlie Day appearing in pretty much anything. Also, the band The Boxer Rebellion, whose music is featured prominently, was great, and I was happy to tell Alissa as much. She had been tweeting beforehand that they were great, and she was totally right.
Wednesday, August 11
XOCO again before another screening (this time it was The Expendables). This torta was just okay, and it gave me heartburn. I didn’t eat my sandwich on-line, as I didn’t have an appetite. I didn’t have an appetite because a girl sitting on the floor near me had kicked off her grubby sandals and as soon as I saw the dirty soles of her feet the last thing I wanted to do was eat.
This screening wasn’t organized by Steve, so I didn’t see the usual Ain’t It Cool film junkies. I saw a lot of people who preferred to carry their belongings not in handbags or backbacks but in a couple of plastic shopping bags from Walgreen’s. People who knew each other and insisted on debating the merits of Grown Ups. The screening was pretty much sold out, though that didn’t stop a few of the old cooters (yes, I know I probably mean “coots” but “cooters” is funnier) from trying to sit one apart from each other. In the row where Nite and I sat, this old guy talked shit about a guy who had the gall, THE GALL, to ask us to move over so he and his girlfriend could sit together. Cooter was schlubby and mean while the boyfriend looked about 6’5″ at 250 pounds. He could have starred in The Expendables, and maybe we could have been spared having to stare at Sylvester Stallone’s face with its oddly peaked eyebrows for two hours.
Thursday, August 12
I finally took in the white Jimmy Choos that I got from Kathy in exchange for an Absolutely Fabulous DVD set. The guy at Brooks Shoe Service asked me if the shoes were dyeable and I was literally like “What do you mean?” It had never occurred to me that $500 shoes wouldn’t be dyeable. What kind of asshole am I that wants to dye designer shoes? The kind of asshole who didn’t want to wear bridal shoes to another woman’s wedding, that’s what. I’m not about to go to Celi and Nate’s wedding and be all “Well, I had to wear white because I just look amazing in it and it was JIMMY CHOO.”
Wedding rules, I abide them.
After work, I had my pupils were dilated when I got my eyes checked. I couldn’t use Twitter for, like, four hours while they went back to normal. It was torture.